Saturday, August 06, 2005
no longer a n00b

mood: -.-
listening to: nothing

So today is my last full day in Japan.

I know when I get back I'm going to be bombarded with the "So, how was it?" question by about everyone who knows I've done this exchange, and who hasn't been reading this blog. Which is pretty much everyone I know, besides well, my beloved readers and my parents.

But to tell you the truth, there isn't one word that can describe this experience. Sure it's been fun, but it's also been fucking horrible. There have been laughs, breakdowns, fun times, shitty times, arguments, agreements, alone time, group time. And there have been, of course, times where I wished I had a revolver so I could shoot my host family in cold blood. But overall, it was worth it. I think.

So when someone asks me "Oh, how was it?" what do I say? Well, it has been interesting to say the least. Liberating as well. But in reality, as a whole, I just don't know. It's been so surreal. One part of me feels like I just got here, one part of me feels like it's been too long, and one part of me is in denial about the other to parts exitsting.

But when I leave tomorrow, to go on that plane back to the US, I know it's going to hit me like a brick to the face. I don't know when the next time I will be in Japan will be. It could be next year, it could be while I'm in college. I hope I lived these 6 weeks to their fullest. But I don't know. I'll tell you when I find out.

In these last moments here, I don't know what to think. I feel like I'm the only one who knows what it has been like. What I have experienced. I'm reassured that those who have been reading at least have some idea.

So I want to say thanks to all of you who have read and commented. Even to those who didn't comment, I know I have silent supporters out there. It helped beyond what you know. It motivated me to write about whatever happened that day, no matter how dull or how boring it may have been.

So to Nup, Paul, Senior3, Gracie, Ellie, my fucking awesome blogger buddies Eileen and Emmie, and anyone else who has been reading or commenting or both: Thanks.

I'm looking forward to seeing you all (or at least those I know) when I get back. Nup, we have to get together sometime before you head off to college. It's mandatory.

And I will be keeping nagoya-n00b up and running, although I'm not really a n00b anymore, I guess. I will be editing some posts, adding some new ones in, and adding more pictures. A new layout, I think, is in order as well. So please keep checking back for updates. But, besides that it's back to stardust.filter, methinks.

As things come to a close, I'll be thinking of you all, my loyal readers.

さようなら、日本
ありがとう。

Until America,
Erin